It's Almost Always a Hurtful Affair. Why Go After a Married Man?
Griffith also identifies poor self-esteem and a fear of commitment as characteristics common to women who choose married men. Discover your motivation and work on your inner issues so an available man is more appealing to you than the unavailable married man.
If he has kids, they are likely to resent you because you broke up their home, and his wife is not likely to welcome you with open arms and a loving smile. You are doomed to live with the consequences of the affair if you marry him, and your reputation with family, friends and co-workers could suffer.
A realistic look at your future could suddenly look far less rosy and attractive. Your outlook and self-esteem could take a more positive turn if you take a realistic look at what you have to offer a life partner.
Be clear about the information you discover about yourself and include parts of that information in a profile on a dating site, specifying that you seek only single men.
The number of responses you get should help you see that your prospects for a romantic relationship are not limited to a man who will probably never be yours, or if he is, he will be so encumbered with baggage that you have no chance for happiness.
You can weed out many of the undesirable men if you know what you need in a relationship and can articulate it to a prospective date partner.
Once the initial infatuation stage of your attraction is over, you can take off the rose-colored glasses and begin to see if this man can give you what you need. If your need is for frequent affection, sexual fulfillment, family and economic commitment, conversation and honesty and openness, it soon becomes obvious that a married man might meet some, but not all your needs.
Ask yourself how he can meet your need for honesty and openness if you have to hide the affair from your family and friends or how you get frequent conversation and affection if his off time belongs to his family.
Kathryn Rateliff Barr has taught birth, parenting, vaccinations and alternative medicine classes since She is a pastoral family counselor and has parented birth, step, adopted and foster children.